The Unspoken Struggle: Living Between Languages- Language Barriers

When we migrate, we do not only cross borders—we also cross into another language; sometimes we name it "Language barriers". Suddenly, the simplest things—ordering coffee, asking for directions, introducing ourselves—require effort. Words that once flowed naturally now feel heavy, clumsy, incomplete.

This experience often brings an invisible layer of stress. We may feel intelligent and articulate in our native tongue, yet reduced to silence in the new one. Some migrants describe it as “losing a part of myself.” In psychoanalytic terms, language is not only a tool of communication—it is a container of identity. Each word carries memories, emotions, and pieces of our unconscious.

When we cannot access those words, it may feel as if we are cut off from parts of who we are. This is why a person may feel both present and absent at once: physically alive in the new country, but emotionally muted.

The struggle with a new language can also awaken older experiences. For example, someone who grew up feeling unheard may find the challenge of speaking a foreign tongue especially painful. The sense of being misunderstood is not only about grammar—it resonates with past wounds of invisibility.

And yet, this struggle can also open new possibilities. To learn a new language is to create new connections, to discover different ways of expressing desire, love, even humor. Some people notice that their “second-language self” has a slightly different personality—more cautious, more playful, or more daring. It is as if migration allows us to reassemble ourselves in surprising ways.

Still, the process is rarely smooth. Feelings of shame, isolation, or frustration often appear along the way. These emotions deserve attention, not dismissal. Working through them, rather than avoiding them, allows us to integrate both languages—and both selves—into a richer identity.

If you recognize yourself in this struggle, know that you are not alone. Exploring these feelings in a safe therapeutic space can help transform the experience of language from a barrier into a bridge.

If you feel ready to reflect on your own journey between languages, I would be glad to explore this path with you in a session.